Maybe because I was trying so hard and consciously trying to make it happen.
The policy was forced upon it; and was only pursued consciously when it became obvious.
Everything I found in books that pleased me I retained in my memory, consciously or unconsciously, and adapted it.
Man lives consciously for himself, but is an unconscious instrument in the attainment of the historic, universal, aims of humanity.
The history of Baalism among the Hebrews is obscured by the difficulty of determining whether the false worship which the prophets stigmatize is the heathen worship of Yahweh under a conception, and often with rites, which treated him as a local nature god; or whether Baalism was consciously recognized to be distinct from Yahwism from the first.
