plumber quotes

Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on weekends.

-Allen,Woody pseudonym of  Allen Stewart Konigsberg
  'My Philosophy', in the NewYorker, 27 Dec.

But you are dull, nothing comes nimbly from you; you dance like a plumber's daughter and deserve two thousand pound in lead to your marriage, and not in goldsmith's ware.

-Middleton,Thomas
  A Chaste Maid in Cheapside (published1630), act1, sc.1.

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Webster's New World Dictionary of Quotations Copyright © 2005 by Chambers Harrap Publishers Ltd. All rights reserved. Published by Wiley, Hoboken, NJ. Used by arrangement with John Wiley & Sons, Inc.